Tag Archives: The Wardstone Chronicles

The Seventh Son (2012)

Yup, the Last Apprentice series is going on widescreen!

If you haven’t read the Last Apprentice series, I suggest you a) read the books, then come back to check out my review on the eight book, Rage of the Fallen. Here.

So, Ben Barnes is going to play Tom Ward, which is pretty cool. My friend goes on and on about how he should have played Sirius Black in Harry Potter because he’s so awesome and blah. I really like his hair in this picture.

In case you don’t know him, he’s the dude who played Prince Caspian in Narnia, and he’s pretty hot, but even then, I was like, yeah, he’s handsome, but he’s old. And he hasn’t got any younger since that movie- he is now 30 and Tom Ward’s supposed to be 13 in the first book. But honestly, I don’t care. They could give a chicken a twig and cast it as Tom Ward for all I care (that would actually be quite accurate, come to think of it) Also, not only is Ben Barnes too old for Tom Ward, he is too hot. Honestly. Tom Ward is not hot.

He doesn’t usually have such funky hair though, but it still looks pretty good.

At first the dude who was supposed to play Tom Ward was the priesty, religious, muscular guy who falls in love with a mermaid in Pirates of the Carribean, On Stranger Tides, a.k.a. Sam Claflin, but it isn’t him anymore. He’s slightly younger than Ben Barnes (he’s 24, I think) but making him act as Tom Ward is probably a little cruel- he’ll then have had way too many semi-human love interests. First a mermaid and now a witch. So unless he’s casted in some Twilight-flick where he’s the male version of Bella who falls in love with both a vampire and a werewolf at the same time, I think he’d be better off taking some other role somewhere else where he gets to marry a normal person, or else with all the odd children he’ll have, he’ll be able to open his house up as a zoo or something. Ok, maybe not a zoo. More like a haunted house.

But I do care about who plays Alice, and it’s this random person called Alicia Vikander that I’ve never heard of in my entire life. Which is not very long, but still. She looks quite pretty in a witch-like way (not an insult) so I think the directors have at least one member of the cast nailed. This is a picture of her: You can see for yourself.

The Spook is played by Jeff Bridges, and Mother Malkin by Julliane Moore. No problems there. In fact, I give my whole-hearted support.

The movie is coming out in 2013, which is absolutely ridiculous, because they announced the start of the project at the beginning of 2011. What, are they filming a 800 episode drama or something? (Believe me, it has been done, and I think in less time, too)

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Last Apprentice Series: Rage of the Fallen

 
Author: Joseph Delaney

Plot:

This is book eight of the Last Apprentice series (but it’s also known as the Spook’s Destiny, 8th book of the Wardstone Chronicles in Britain) I’ve got to say though, the American version sounds way cooler than the British version. I mean, what the heck is a wardstone supposed to be? A gem stone you put on ladies’ jewelry?

Anyway, if you haven’t heard of the book series, it’s about a guy called Tom Ward who’s a Spook’s Apprentice, which means he goes around with John, a Spook, fighting dark, evil things like boggarts, witches, shamans, and ancient Gods from exotic religions. In this book, though, he fights a goat. What? Goats are dangerous. They can…um…squirt milk on you.

Only joking. This particular goat happens to be a God, the Greek god of nature Pan (no, not the things you cook eggs with), to be exact. He might or might not have looked like the guy below. I’m really not sure about the red hair. Whoever’s heard of a goat having red hair, God or not?

Anyway, in between all the fighting, Tom Ward somehow finds time to fall in love. Unfortunately, it’s a tragic love story, because the girl Tom Ward falls in love with is a witch. That’s not really a problem if you’re Harry Potter, but Spooks are supposed to killwitches, not marry them. The Spook does not approve of this at all, because he is an old prude doesn’t trust witches (though that didn’t stop him at the time-yes, he had a scandalous little affair in his youth. Check out the third book in the series) But anyway, it doesn’t matter whether Spook approves or not anymore, because Tom and Alice have to stay together or they die. Literally.
The Fiend will kill Tom immediately if he has a chance, because apparently there is a prophecy that he will one day triumph over the Fiend (yes, pathetic dumbo that he is. I have a vague suspicion that professor Trelawney made this prophecy, because it is soimprobable).In comes Alice, who happens to be the Fiend’s daughter (and mega-ly powerful). She, for some weird reason unknown to man, she falls in love with him and, fearing for his life, makes him a blood jar that will protect him from the fiend. This greatly compromises her safety from the fiend, so now they both have to stay close to the blood jar, because once they stray from its protection, the Fiend will whisk them away to torture for eternity.
In this book, that’s exactly what happens.
Tom gets captured by this celtic witch who holds a grudge on him, and thus Alice is separated from the blood jar and is captured by the Fiend. Unfortunately, other than having to battle the Fiend to save Alice, Tom also has to contend with the annoying Celtic Witch, Pan, and the Evil Pan Worshippers, some shamans who are determined to get rid of Tom and Spook. Luckily, Tom somehow picks up a legendary sword known as Destiny’s Blade and has got himself a powerful witch ally Grimalkin, who’s bent on getting her own revenge on the Fiend.The showdown between the Fiend and Tom Ward that the previous books have been building up to takes place in this book. The battle is not going to be the last between them, not even the most important, but it is still a battle against the Lord of the Dark, so it’s definitely legendary.
Review:
As you all know, some book series die off at the third or fourth book, becoming really repetitive and sort of lame after awhile (Maximum ride, Ranger’s Apprentice-although the last few books were getting better) But this series seems to be steadily improving. In fact, it’s one of those series you want to go on forever, like Percy Jackson and Artemis Fowl, although I’d pity Tom Ward. Can you imagine an eternity of fighting evil? You can’t even retire, because once you do, the Fiend will whisk you away into the dark. No, not to sleep. To torture.
Seriously though, one thing I feel pretty annoyed about is that there is a complete lack of strong and un-annoying male characters. Check out my post about why Joseph Delaney is definitely and most undoubtedly a feminist. But other than having to read about male-losers all the time, this book series is actually pretty entertaining to read.
It doesn’t really have a very complex plot, doesn’t explore deep ideas, isn’t touching or thought-provoking, but it is entertaining. An absolute witch-burning, monster-thumping, goat-milking, boggart-enslaving, Fiend-binding galore. It’s the perfect thing to take to class with you as an antidote to your teacher’s droning voice, a revival potion if you have to do a piece of abysmally boring homework but can’t seem to keep awake. All in all, pretty useful.
Score:
7.8/10 Not bad at all, unlike the Fiend, who’s completely, unabashedly bad.
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